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Why do we lose our strong relationships?

Why do we lose our strong relationships?

Life is like a road, relationships are like vehicles on this road, and we are drivers. As it is necessary to avoid collisions and accidents on the road, hence the same stands for the life. We also need to avoid toxic conflicts to maintain healthy and strong relationships. But this is not reality. Today life is portrayed with lost relationships, depression, a game of blaming, and nostalgia of the past. Have you ever thought why do we lose our strong relationships? We always think that we are right and do not see the other side of the situation. Here comes the reason when we are wrong. In this article, I will sum up why do we lose our strong relationships? How can we maintain them healthily?

Maintain a safe distance to keep strong relationships

Whenever you are traveling on a highway, you may have seen some signboards with words;

“Maintain safe distance”

The use of this rule on the road avoids collisions of vehicles and escapes accidents. When drivers abide by this rule and maintain that safe distance, traffic on the road keeps on running smoothly without any mishappening and interruption. If safe distance on a highway can avoid collisions and mishaps, do not you think it is vital on the road of life as well. Yes, it is essential in relationships also. Always maintain a proper distance in the relationships to keep them running healthily and smoothly. But what do I mean by safe distance? How can we maintain it? Let me explain a bit more to make sense.

What do I mean by term relationship? By term relationship, I mean friendship, kinship, relation with the life partner, parent-child relation, and relationship of any kind.

Check my another article about what to do when you are worried here

What kills relationships?

Now come to the point. What we do in relationships that take the relationship to the edge of abandoning.

  • We expect too much and unrealistically.
  • We are not willing to give personal space to the next person.
  • We keep on complaining.
  • We do not give the required freedom that makes one feel bound and imprisoned.

These things kill even healthy and strong relationships and when does it happen when we do not maintain a safe distance. Everyone is like a closed book and we have to read them. We can read anyone by putting ourselves in his/her shoes. Secondly, everyone is free to live as he wants and we cannot bound anyone within our annex. The problem arises when we try to snatch personal freedom. When we want to bound our relations and make them feel overwhelmed by our unrealistic expectations. We, human beings do not have supernatural powers to meet unrealistic expectations. When the next person cannot fulfill our expectations, misunderstandings balloon up. We complain about our unmet expectations then conflicts arise. Mutual understanding and peace are lost somewhere. We become unwilling to give personal space to the next person and want to inundate him/her with our will.

By doing this we go against nature. Everyone wants space and freedom even you, I, and everyone else. Anyone can bear this kind of behavior for a limited time. Expectations, complaints, and lack of personal space make relationships burden and we, weak human beings, burn out one day by carrying these burdens. Then what happens next, first we lose peace, then mutual understanding, at last relationship itself.

How to maintain relationships healthily?

Make rules of your life. Write them somewhere you can see them at least thrice a day so that you may remember them repeatedly. Your rules must contain these fundamentals;

  • I will expect less and appreciate more.
  • I will stop myself from complaining.
  • I will give personal space in relationships and will not make them feel overwhelmed.

YOu will notice the change within a week. Just apply these rules in your life and make it part of your permanent habits.

I hope it will help many people but here an example is my life. There has been a time when I complained and expected then I got rid of these toxic habits. Now, I am always happy. After reading, leave your comments and let me feel honored with your opinion. Keep visiting this site for more such life-changing posts.

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About The Author


She is a scientific researcher and freelance writer.


  1. Akhtar

    Great Ma Sha Allah…
    Its really a useful material on the subject and you hv explained in an excellent way
    Keep it up IG 👌

    • Iram Gul

      thank you.

  2. Noroz

    Very Nice Gul and of course an intelligent thought too

    Agreed all your points are 100% valid
    Too much closer is dangerous for good relationship. I applied on my friends and I did start feeling that now friend is being irritate of my company so I start distancing for sometime and wait for the feelings become better about me.

    Freedom is a nature of every creature so agreed and if we don’t give freedom they don’t grow nice .

    But to some extend sometimes we need to stop our love ones if they selecting wrong way due to not much experience of the outside atmosphere

    Wish you success on each step of you life



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